Christen reached out to me to let me know that they heard the good news on vacation yesterday. Even while on the beach, they all celebrated with smiles and possibly even some tears. Another milestone is behind us. Many more to go, but we will tackle them as they come.
I think I am still on high from the wonderful news!
My mind was running a mile a minute as I drove down to VCU - leaving the house about 45 minutes early, just in case. I had an 8 inch text message of directions of where to go and what to do from the nurse. Trying to figure all of that out, I arrived and waited in line on the right floor of the Children's Hospital of Richmond. It was interesting - I was the minority there, simply because I didn't speak Spanish. Just being in line was a humbling experience of its own - so many children passed through that obviously have constant struggles were ushered in and out. It is always good to be reminded of our two healthy children and how we should truly be thankful for them.
As I waited in line for my turn to check in, I received a text message from the nurse telling me to stay at home and to show up an hour late as they were running behind. Normally, this type of pivoting would throw me for a loop and piss me off to no end. If nothing is precious, time is. For some reason, I was calm and collected. Who cares. I let her know that it wasn't a problem, I would be in the lobby when they were ready. I wasn't expecting to sit for an hour and fifteen minutes, but so be it! The nurse met me in the lobby just to introduce herself and apologize about the wait. I tried to help her realize that everything was fine.
I texted the nurse to see if I could eat an apple as I was specifically told no sugar or caffeine prior to the ultrasound. How was I so peaceful without my diet coke? I don't know, but I was ready to get out of there and get a hold of one, for sure. There were no issues with the apple so I ate that and some nuts I had packed since I was told it was going to be a long day. 1.5-2 hours for the echo alone. This did not include time with the fetal cardiologist afterwards.
Give or take several more minutes, someone in scrubs came out of the doors where I would be taken back. It was the nicest lady who introduced herself and also apologized for the delay. We spoke for at least ten minutes about the procedure, her tenure in the field, this gestational carrier journey, etc. It was such a nice conversation. Eventually, she got a text message that said that the room was now available and that I would be taken back shortly. In no time, I was back on the table and catered to, ensuring my comfort.
The baby offered great views at first, of parts of the heart that are often difficult to scan. As time went on, this wiggle worm kept moving and it was really tough for the sonographer to get the still pictures/heartbeats of the flows through to different parts of the body. At one point, she asked to take a break to see if baby would stop moving. I welcomed that as my back was starting to hurt. I sat up and the next thing I knew, she told me she felt that she had what she needed and she was going to ensure that the doctor agreed.
Dr. Bhurtel came into the room, took the wand, and started doing some scanning of his own. Meanwhile, everything they comment on is "beautiful." I suppose this is good, but who knows? After about 5 minutes (about 50 minutes total on the table), the told me I could start cleaning up and get ready to head into the conference room to review everything. That felt strange. Why can't you tell me what I need to know now? Maybe they just needed the room?
I was ushered to the meeting room with Dr. Bhurtel and Wanda. I asked if I could call Phillip so that he could hear what the doctor had to say, which was fine. With Phillip on the phone, Dr. Bhurtel was concise and efficient, saying in very few words that the baby's heart is perfect! PERFECT! What a huge relief! As I drove home, the exhaustion of the stress and unknown hit me. I felt like I could barely keep my head up! As the day went on, I tried to update those that were in the know, each time expressing praises for our God. He is the one that is making the calls here, we are just a means of His will.
Three days of additional worry, all for nothing. But, adding necessary perspective to keep us humbled.
Well, that project I started a couple of weeks ago has really taken shape over the last couple of days! I am taking mental health breaks here and there to think about what I want it to be, how I want it displayed, and getting to it all. I am pleased with the progress thus far and think I should be done in a couple of more days! I am praying so hard that everything seen tomorrow is just fine and our minds can be at ease again. I know that so many of us are in the same boat of worry - only time will give us the answers we need. Until then, I will do my best to divert this nervous energy into something for my wombmate!
Not so much! The more I think about the upcoming echo, the more uneasy I get. I have been on pins and needles all evening just knowing that I cannot wait until August 9th. On the other hand, this is the one day that Bethany's dear mom was going to be able to go and we had her down to do just that. I so want her to be in on this journey as much as possible and I would give anything for her to go with me. I reached out to Bethany and asked her if it would be okay if I could reach back out to the nurse to be put on a cancellation list or anything to be seen sooner - the waiting is the hardest part.
As Bethany wrote me back, very in tune with my hope to get in sooner, she also gave me some really unfortunate news. Their dog, Lucy passed away this morning. Oh my goodness, I cannot imagine. They are at such a vulnerable stage in their lives and the grieving process must be so difficult. I wish there was something I could do, but we all know there is nothing. They had returned to NoVA and Phillip was traveling so Bethany was alone, which made it worse. I am glad she chose to cancel her clients for the day and take time for herself. All I can think is that this little baby has the best four legged angel watching over her!
My head was trying to figure everything out and I kept thinking about what the nurse told me to try to ease my mind. Fetal echos are ordered for any/all of three different reasons:
This morning, we had our 24 week appointment. They had scheduled a follow up ultrasound because during the one at the 20 week appointment, little gal was not fully cooperating and not all of the views of the heart could be obtained. We welcomed that as it would be another opportunity for Bethany and Phillip to be there in person to see the baby. There were so many smiles when they got to see her sweet face and then every other little part of her body. It was so special to share in their joy. Everything in the ultrasound went great (so we thought) and we were taken back to then meet with Dr. C.
I was thrilled to notice that I did not gain any weight last month. This is a huge relief considering that I had gained almost 10 pounds each of the last two months. It was really difficult but keeping exercise at the forefront and being mindful about my nutrition made all of the difference. Just as I learned over the last couple of years, it is isn't that difficult if I have my priorities straight. Also, all of the moving boxes and back and forth from house to house could have definitely kept me more active than normal. I hope that I can keep up the weight maintenance and only gain minimally from here on out.
When Dr. C came into the room she suggested there may be a need for further ultrasounds, but wanted to confirm with the fetal cardiologist. Within seconds, she took a phone call from that individual that confirmed there were a couple of views that we were unable to get today and that I would have to be scheduled for fetal echocardiogram, just to make sure that there are no issues. While Dr. C did say that she is not concerned, the procedure must be done to rule out any problems.
The remainder of the appointment went great. Dr. C is very happy with every bit of progress. The baby is measuring 25w5 days and we are currently at 25w3d. Also, she's measuring in the 50th percentile, which is right on track and where she needs to be. For monitoring purposes, Dr. C asked that I schedule a growth check (another ultrasound) at the 30 week appointment scheduled for September. The 28 week appointment on the calendar is when I will have to drink that nasty, sugary stuff and then get a lot of bloodwork to rule out gestational diabetes. It is fun, let me tell you. The most important thing is to have it ruled out sooner rather than later, though. If I don't "pass" this test, then I will be subject to a three hour screening, which I have heard is even worse.
We left the appointment happy to know that all is health. On the way home, VCU called to see if I could come directly there for the echo. This was really alarming to me. Dr. C had said that there was no urgency for the scan, but it was necessary. The lady was super nice but when she told me that the echo could last 2 hours, I knew I needed to get back to work. I told her I would call her when I got home to schedule the appointment when it worked with both of our calendars. Fast forward, we got an appointment for August 9th for the fetal echocardiogram.
All's well that ends well!
I guess it wouldn't be a family affair without a little bit of drama thrown in the mix. What I am learning quickly is that there is an even more complicated dynamic of it all because we are basically family. We probably know too much about each other and what is going on, to be honest. While those dramatic things are fun to dwell on and bitch about, I am coming to the realization that even when I agree, I am really just adding fuel to the fire which isn't fair to anyone.
At this point, I am praying to just keep my mouth shut and support when asked. The last thing I want is to create additional, unnecessary stress to any of us!
On the other hand, we are 25 weeks today! There is so much to celebrate. It is still so surreal (I will probably be saying this for years to come). I am excited to see Bethany and Phillip Monday morning as we head to the 24 week appointment for an ultrasound and time with Dr. C.
This evening I got to share a really sweet few minutes with Meade. For a while now, when I ask Meade what the baby's name should be, she always says "Flower." Perfect! Not realistic but a great little nickname from our family. Tonight I was laying on the couch with Meade and the baby was dancing in my belly. I asked Meade if she wanted to feel it. Meade put her hand on my tummy and to see her face light up when she felt the movement is a little memory I will always cherish. It was the sweetest. She then proceeded to kiss my belly, as if kissing little Flower.
On the other hand, I asked Gregory if he'd like to feel and looked at me like I was crazy. It is funny how different these two kids are!
Our Flower seems to be perfectly happy nestled in my belly! We can't wait to meet this little girl and she better watch out - Meade is already planning what games they will play and what colors they will paint their finger nails - when she is old enough, of course!
