one of the many whys

So often, I am faced with the question of Why.  Why would I do something like this?  Well, the better question, which is likely throwing a challenge back at the inquirer is Why Not?

There is no definitive list of why I am here other than the fact that I want to be.  I want Bethany and Phillip to be the parents they deserve to be.  I want to prove to myself that I can do this.  I want the world to be a brighter place for everyone and with a smidge of kindness, we can all work toward that.  Maybe this is my smidge?  Well, today, I figured out another why - and a selfish one!

I was at the pool with the kids this evening and while I look like a whale, there was an obviously pregnant mom next to me.  I started chatting with her and she explained something that I have dreamt of since day one of this offer.  This young lady was enamored when I told her that I was expecting yet it wasn't for our family.  She started to tear up and told me that she used to be a Labor and Delivery nurse for several years.  She said after a while, the excitement of new babies everyday wears off.  I can see that if it is your day to day operations.  She followed up to tell me that in the middle of the few years she worked as a nurse on that unit, there was one special delivery that will always stand out - when a carrier delivered for her intended parents.  She said that she had never experienced something more beautiful than to be in the delivery room with the carrier, her husband, and the two expecting parents.  Everyone in the room was crying before it was all over and it was just the best situation to witness.

While I never thought of it like that before, this is one of my whys.  I want to be able to provide this experience for us all - our families and those helping us from the medical perspective.  I have often said that this will be the most beautiful gift I can ever give anyone.  What I didn't realize that the moments of this birth with be another just as beautiful opportunity for everyone there to experience it. 

This is it y'all.  I totally own the selfishness of this one - I can't wait for this special time in each of our lives!