a big day

Today is a big day.  I have an appointment with OBGYN to get my IUD removed.  I have not seen her since I had my annual appointment in August and asked her if surrogacy was something I could consider.  I am not sure she believed me when I asked her, but shit is getting real.  After my appointment in August, my doctor moved from the practice where I have been going to her for 10 years to VCU to also teach.  So, this will be a new facility - I am sure that parking will be lovely - but I do get to see Dr. C and meet her nurse that has helped me a few times over the phone.  I couldn't be more excited to get the ball rolling a little faster!

For the first time of this journey, it seems as though Dr. Nair's clinical coordinator is starting to drive things.  I feel like they believe we are in for the long haul, too.  The fact that she asked us when we wanted to do more testing is huge to me.  I have been driving all of the correspondence (and likely driving them nuts), but I suppose they can see that through the weight loss progress and my desire to get my ducks in a row, this is real. 

I had a little bit of a breakdown this morning.  A rush of emotions came over me while I was on the treadmill getting three miles in.  The tears wouldn't stop coming.  All of this is getting real.  My life has never been so perfect.  I have never had so much peace and gratitude in my heart.  I am thankful for all that have allowed me to share this journey and have given their support.  I honestly never knew life could be so wonderful.  It sounds so cliche, but it is true.  Finally, after letting the tears flow for a minute, I put my big girl pants back on, grabbed some extra water and got back to walking.  It felt good to have that cry, though.  It really reinforces my faith throughout all of this.  None of these words can do my heart justice.  There is nothing to describe what I am feeling, but it is right.

"You will never find peace of mind until you listen to your heart."  ~ George Michael