terrified

When anyone offers kind words of congratulations, I always preface my response by the fact that we have so long to go.  It is true.  Anything can happen at any time and we must remain cognizant of that.  When a friend asked how I really felt, I wrote:  terrified.  I am.  I am scared that it won't work.  Scared that we will get bad news.  Scared that anything will go wrong.  Unfortunately we have been on this road where everything keeps going wrong. But, then, I have to keep remembering that we are here for a reason and that will be realized even if we encounter more bumps.  

I think I caught my friend off guard when I was brutally honest.  Her response was exactly what I needed to hear:  It is okay to be terrified.  There's no right or wrong way to feel.  You're a warrior.  If this was easy, everyone would do it.

I hate to think that I need that nudge or positive reassurance from time to time, but I am human and it helps.  She is exactly right.  Now to just keep my mind, heart, and emotions in the same place!