My anxiety is through the roof. I conceded and told the person at work that I would take the parental leave yesterday. I couldn't sleep at all last night. I got up and went through a ton of hand me down clothes for Meade. This morning, I checked the parental leave policy online and saw that it is not applicable for surrogates. While I am not technically a surrogate, I am sure that gestational carrier will fall into the same category. The paperwork sent over said "newborn care." Since I am not caring for a newborn, it wouldn't be ethical of me to take this benefit.
On top of all of this mind fuck, both Gregory and Meade have been home today. Trying to get much done is tough. The kids went to see Ms. Sally down the street to play with their grandchildren, thank goodness. I needed that hour. I sat at the puzzle table and cried. There must've been eight soiled tissues on the table when Jacob got home. He doesn't get it and I am thankful for that.
Due to Gregory being out this week, I took Meade out for Thursday and Friday and headed to my parents' this evening. At least I will get a little bit of help with the children and try to forget the work stuff. hoping for a couple of easy days to return home for Jacob's birthday Saturday.
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