letting go

I am one to plan things to a T and get pissed when they don't go like I think they should.  We all know that things change, plans are diverted, and Plan B often becomes a reality.  We live in a new world of COVID - it is second nature now.  I never used to have a Plan B because only Plan A was important to me.  There was no room for error.  Over the last few months, I have learned that life is so much easier if I let go of control.

Instead of getting so utterly angry when someone cancels, I give them the out at the time of scheduling.  "If something crazy comes up, I totally understand."  Let me tell you that having this new mindset does me wonders!  I started to realize that when I get rattled, it is only bothering me - nobody else cares - so why let it?  

We had a busy yet great weekend.  We had plans to go to the south side for a nephew's birthday so I wanted to get as much in down there as I could.  Even though Bethany was going to the party, Makenna was not so I wanted to see her for a few minutes if they were up for it.  I made supper for a friend to drop off to them, and I was finally getting rid of the rest of the IVF meds that someone on facebook marketplace wanted.  It was a lot, but we got it done and made it to the birthday party on time.

Even though I only had about 20 minutes with sweet baby Henry, I enjoyed every second of it.  She was fussy and hungry, but it didn't bother me in the least.  I just love getting to be with her.  She's not yet at my favorite baby stage, but the bond there is real.  I can't wait until she is sitting up on her own and able to react and smile back, etc.  We were offered to go have more cousin time after the party, but I knew my children were going to be disasters if we tried.  They went to a neighbor's to play yesterday and acted like such little assholes when Jacob went to pick them up, that I didn't want to set them up for that kind of meltdown again.  

Today, we again had plans to go to friends' for the Super Bowl.  We all had a blast and Jacob was even okay to stay until the end of the first quarter, which never happens.  He hates having distractions during football, but we compromised and everything went really well.  

Tomorrow is going to be a tough day!  I am up entirely too late, cheering on the Bengals!