"you are so unusual"

I had the opportunity to speak to one of Ms. Clare's sweetest friends today.  Remember, Ms. Clare is the lady with Parkinson's and dementia that I helped for several years and we had a bond that I will cherish forever.  Now, that bond is continued through a wonderful friendship with her daughter Adrienne.  Adrienne let me know that Anne, Ms. Clare's friend, was struggling with a few things and that she asked about me.  Of course I could call her! 

At 97, Anne answered the phone and was down at first.  When she heard it was me, it was like life jumped back into her and her spirit was contagious.  Before I could ask her how she was doing, she blurted out "you are so unusual!" I had to laugh and agree with her but she went on to say that she has never known anyone to do something so wonderful for someone else.  That I hit pause on my own life for several years to make it happen.  That I was more devoted and dedicated to help create a family than she has ever seen.

All very, very sweet, but it still stands out that she thinks I am so unusual.  Maybe I am.  I think I am just letting God work through me.  It was obvious that is what it was about in August of 2018, but what now?  We talked about everything under the sun and I offered to go with her to some upcoming appointments because she has no family in Virginia.  She wouldn't accept my offer for next week but is going to keep me in mind for future appointments.  That's what it is all about - there's no reason I can't take off half a day of work to spend quality time with Anne and make sure she gets to and from an appointment safely.  The most beautiful thing is that always before we hang up, we both say "I love you."  What spawned out of a gig to make more money 9 years ago is yet another beautiful relationship that I treasure.  

While Anne has no doubt that I will find my new purpose, I continue to wonder "what if?" I was stewing over what has been in my heart all week, the What Now Retreat, as Jacob came home.  I felt somewhat conflicted because I didn't want to mention it to him unless I was sure it was something I wanted to do.  After all, it is going to cost quite a lot of money and he will need major help with the children if he still wants to work if I go.  

I was nervous and excited when Jacob walked in the office.  I asked him if I was crazy and went into how I think this may be a good opportunity.  His simple response was "you can't take the brinks truck with you." He knows what I worry about the most - the financial hit it would take from our savings.  But, he was more than supportive and told me "go - just go."  What a weight lifted off my shoulders!  Jacob is happy to let me go.  He isn't stressed about having the children by himself.  He said that I get a bonus for a reason to take some of that money and just go.  I can't believe it, but I am beyond grateful to him for understanding that this may be in my future.  After all, it will only help us as a family unit if I find who I am supposed to be in the midst of being a wife and a mother that oftentimes spirals out of control.

Now what?  Now, I go into my meeting next Tuesday with the support of the people I love most knowing I am ready if it is where this life should take me at this time.