parenting woes

We had a lovely morning at the zoo today with some family friends.  It was such a delight to see their faces and excitement over every single animal.  It was quite exhausting, too.  

I had reached out about scheduling a conference with Meade’s teacher.  That was Monday.  I knew that we would be told of some of her shortcomings and have things to work on.  It is normal – she is four.  What I didn’t realize was that the 15 minutes would turn into “here is why Meade doesn’t fit into this program.”  The teacher counted 41 times that she had to be redirected last Friday.  On top of that, they were playing vet (Meade has no pets and desperately wants them so this is a tough subject in our house).  Meade said the pet was dead – redirected not to talk about death.  Meade said there was blood – redirected not to talk about blood.  Meade said there was pooping issues – redirected not to talk about poop.  Meade said the pet was vomiting – redirected not to talk about vomiting.  The pet is at the fucking vet!  There must be issues!  

Much of this boiled down to the fact that she believes Meade needs counseling.  I broke.  I have failed the kids as a parent.  While doing my damnedest to get through my own grief, I have failed to realize that the children are also struggling and can likely benefit from the same.  Why didn’t I think of that?  What a slap in the face.

I got right on it.  I called the pediatrician right away and got their first available appointment for April 8th.  I called around to other places, too.  I contacted a concierge practice that I was just going to pay for, but they could only see her virtually.  I am not sure that a 4 year old will benefit from virtual counseling.  I sent emails to three others and called another.  We are on a wait list at two now and I have reached out personally to an old friend that is at one of those practices where we are waitlisted.  The teacher also informed me that she tried to reach out to the guidance counselor but was not in at the time.  Her last message was “I will let you know if you know if we don’t see improvement and maybe need to look at different supports for Meade :).”